Finding simple daily ways to pause, reflect and regroup can help do away with the lingering disquiet that persists after the pandemic.
A hangover is what happens when someone drinks too much the night before. Their system needs time to recover. Until then, they don’t feel very well. Pop two Advils and move slowly.
Our society seems to be experiencing a collective hangover from the pandemic. On the outside things look okay. But, if we’re being honest, something still feels “off” to many people. There persists a cloud of fatigue. It’s hard to describe. Our heads don’t ache, but many of our souls do.
Isolation may have had the biggest negative impact on our mental health. People of all ages – especially children – are (and will be) dealing with the ripple effects of being mandated out of social interaction for a long time. Or, perhaps, we won’t be dealing with these ripples, which is perhaps even more concerning.
So, what’s to be done? Where can we start to recover from these residual effects in our hearts and minds? While there are lots of restorative options to consider, two of them may be simpler and more joy-recovering than you’d think: the lost art of porch-sitting and the evening constitutional.
Porch-sitting is unplugged and un-rushed. It’s reflecting and pondering–sometimes with others, sometimes alone. As the world goes by, we are reminded that it doesn’t all depend on us. A mind that doesn’t rest well is a mind that doesn’t work well. Porch-sitting helps. The word “tarry” is due for a comeback.
And then there’s the evening constitutional. On Downton Abbey, a butler named Spratt would go for a stroll in the evening. He called it his “evening constitutional.” It used to be more common – kind of like phone booths and no shopping on Sundays. It was a way of re-centring oneself – one’s inner constitution – after a meal and the day’s work. Not only did it settle one’s food, but one’s thinking as he or she wound down another day.
When you sit on the porch or go for a walk, more happens than sitting or walking, especially when your phone is left behind and the main destination is within yourself. You might see a neighbour and exchange how-do-you-dos. Or you might not. The real benefit happens when you reacquaint yourself with a moderate pace and regain some perspective. That tends to happen when the evening breeze whispers in your ear and you cleanse yourself from a gritty day (or year).
A lot has been said about how we have exchanged real connection for virtual connection. But other connections have also suffered: those we have with ourselves and with God. Flickering screens, notifications on our phones, and doom scrolling bring with them a certain heaviness and foster languishing. These days “No Connection” isn’t just a warning that your WiFi is gone. It raises questions worthy of some curious contemplation: How can we be so close to people, ourselves and God, and yet feel so far from people, ourselves and God?
We lost many things in the pandemic, including loved ones and graduation ceremonies. We may also feel like we lost something within, something that is hard to name but hard to live without. Perhaps simple practices like porch-sitting and evening constitutionals are just what we need – deep breaths for the soul. A way of creating space for the reflection and regrouping that you need. If you’ve felt “off,” perhaps your next best step is more refreshing and accessible than you think.
Sarah Joy Covey is a registered psychotherapist who founded and directs the Covey Wellness Centre in Elmvale, Ont., which offers counselling online and in-person as well as a podcast, blog and other mental health resources. Matthew Ruttan is host of The Pulse Podcast with Matthew Ruttan, author of free weekday emails called The Up Devotional, and pastor at Westminster Church in Barrie. Forest path photo by Maher Q on Unsplash.